3 Tips to Emotionally Regulate When You're a Busy Mom
Being a mom is tough - it requires a lot, leaving you emotionally dysregulated, burnt-out, and worried in ways you never thought possible.
But there are moments when motherhood is easy (and it’s often when you are feeling emotionally regulated).
As a therapist and neurospicy mother of two, I understand that making time for yourself as a mother can be complicated and, at times, feel impossible. That's why I'm here to share three tips on how to emotionally regulate when you're a busy mom and trying to find some f*cking chill.
Just the other day, I was about to lose it. I mean, like nuclear, lose it on my family. The stress and overwhelm had been building up for weeks, and I could feel it bubbling up inside of me, ready to explode. I wanted to scream, and maybe I did scream. The words were flowing out of my mouth faster than I could even comprehend, and deep down, I knew I didn't want to say the things that were pouring out. But there they were, released into the air, and I couldn’t take them back.
You see, emotions have a funny way of finding their way out, especially when we're low-key stressed and on the verge of burnout. It's like they have a mind of their own, seeking any opportunity to escape. And in that moment, I had reached my breaking point.
But as the dust settled and the echoes of my outburst faded away, I realized something important. I couldn't continue like this. I couldn't let the stress stay in the drivers seat and dictate my actions (damn it I’m the driver of my own life). I needed to find a way to regulate myself, to regain control and express the pent up feelings inside of me.
That's when I gave myself a pep talk (and an evening bath cry) and reminded myself of these THREE crucial things for regulating my nervous system when things are on fire.
They have been game-changers in my journey as a busy mom just trying to get through the day. They've helped many of my mom clients find their inner chill when things bubble over.
So, if you've ever felt on the brink of losing it like I did, or if you simply crave a greater sense of calm and control amidst the chaos of motherhood, keep reading. These tips are for you.*
If you wanna give them a go they just might empower you to prioritize your well-being and transform your days from surviving to thriving.
* You are the expert in your own life. You get to decide if you try or implement any of what I’m about to say. I will not tell you how to spend your time, but I do want you to actually feel alive in this life.
1. Stop Scrolling for the Answers
It's easy (automatic even) to get caught up in the never-ending scroll, constantly searching for magical solutions to all your parenting dilemmas.
This technology is relatively new to our primitive nervous systems and even when we don't "feel" overstimulated, our bodies do.
Scrolling doesn't actually give you the feeling of regulation.
Learning about emotional regulation is important, but it's essential to practice and implement it.
2. Stop That Bitchy Inner Critic and Silent Seething
Negative self-talk and unresolved frustrations will take a toll on your well-being.
Say to that bitchy inner critic “You are not welcome here today, thanks. I’ve got this!”
Release any silent seething that may be building up inside you.
Find healthy outlets for your emotions, whether it's through journaling, talking to a trusted friend, or engaging in creative activities.
When you acknowledge and express your feelings, you create space for presence, fun, and a more regulated nervous system.
3. Believe You Are Already a "Good" Mother
Motherhood is challenging (but I don't need to tell you that) and can often make you doubt yourself and be EXTRA hard on yourself.
Shut down that inner critic and start believing in yourself!
If you find it challenging to give yourself a pat on the back for everything you do right as a mom or let go of perfectionistic tendencies, it might be time for reinforcement!
My clients chose me because they are having a hard time making time for themselves; in fact, it feels impossible.
If we've never met, I'm Kayla. I'm a creative therapist who helps you feel regulated, trust yourself, and create the life you don't need to run away from, even if you have no time and need to be chill like yesterday.
Prioritize your well-being today! Take that first step right now towards a more chill and fulfilling motherhood.
STOP scrolling (like right now, put down your phone. The internet has nothing else to offer you today) and GO regulate yourself.
OK, fine, if you are still here and can't help yourself and you can't put your phone down, check out The Motherload Membership and give yourself a damn break (the one you know you deserve but can't give yourself permission for). Together, we can navigate the challenges of motherhood and help you create the life you want.
Until next time,
Kayla Huszar
