five ways expressive art helps you mother
My son was two when I went to Calgary for my expressive art therapy training. I can’t even describe the bittersweet feeling in my heart as I drove away for the 9 day intensive (NINE whole days - if you are a mom leaving her baby for the first time you know the freedom and worry I felt in this moment). This was the first time I’d left him for more than an over night since he was born. My heart was wide open - I was ready for change, ready for education, ready for creativity.
At the time, I thought everything else was more important than my own self care. I thought that I couldn’t be creative and mother. Mother’s don’t dance in the kitchen, they don't paint, they don't journal - when would they even find the time? Mothers do the laundry, the dishes, the cooking, all the things. These are all stories I’ve told myself (maybe you’ve told yourself these things too).
The expressive arts opened me up, but first it broke me down. I had no idea what I needed until I was faced with the pastel in my hand, blank page staring back at me.
I had to unlearn everything I thought mothers were supposed to be (strong, complacent, all-giving, selfless), in order to learn how to honour my needs, express myself and make time for my self-care. The arts healed me in ways that I can’t describe in words. Ask me to show you in shape & colour and I can do it over and over again - but words - not so much. My intention for pursuing this training wasn’t to “heal” myself, but in a way it happened anyway. My intention was to gain the knowledge and skills to facilitate healing and transformation with the expressive arts in my community. I went because I felt a great calling. Something bigger than me was at work. I was meant to experience this hands-on so that I knew the transformations that were so possible for other women. I do this work for the mothers. Mothers who feel guilty about putting their needs first. Mothers who stay quiet. Mothers who can’t say no. Mothers who cannot give voice to their mental health. Mothers who are struggling with self-care. Mothers who are burned out. Mothers who cannot make one more decision. Mothers who are exhausted but can’t sleep at night. Mothers who do not feel worthy.
The expressive arts healed me from my rough start into motherhood and continues to keep me on the path of intentional mindful creativity - and I need it as much as I need to breathe - I hope you will too.
five reasons why mothers need expressive art therapy:
Expressive Art gets you out of your head
I invite anyone who feels stressed or pressured by every day life to try expressive art therapy, especially mothers who feel burnt out, and defeated. Engaging in art gives you the time & space to slow down while exploring the thoughts that are constantly running amok in your brain, you know, all those thoughts you have that are worrisome, rooted in fear and anxiety provoking.
Expressive art therapy improves the maternal mental health of mothers who are dealing with a variety of issues (including but not limited to: overwhelm, stress, anger, resentment and unhealthy expectations). The focus is on the process and not the final product, so you can let go of perfectionism, play and be yourself. No need to censor or overthink. Creativity will clear the path so you can find meaning and connection in your life. It has been said by many that the creative arts has helped them connect to their breath and body by promoting flow and quieting the mind.Expressive Art creates meaning
Studies also show that creating art stimulates the release of dopamine. This brain chemical gets released when we do something pleasurable, and basically makes us feel happier. It’s that simple, mama. Create something, anything and you will feel lighter, happier and more content with life. Increasing your levels of this feel-good chemical will be very helpful if you are armouring up everyday just to survive.Expressive Art helps you process feelings
One of the greatest benefits to the expressive arts is giving way to a healthy outlet for acknowledging all your feelings and fears. Motherhood comes with it’s gamut of new emotions and it can be hard to navigate on your own. New emotions such as sadness or anger are hard to talk about and when you are unable to express yourself wholeheartedly, making art will help. Creating art will help you acknowledge and recognize the feelings that have been lurking in your subconscious.Expressive Art is inherently validating
It has been said amongst mental health professionals that art therapy has many benefits, from boosting your mood and self-esteem while providing you a safe container to alleviate difficult emotions. It will give you a sense of control over your life by guiding you to know and understand yourself better. The art validates your experience. It is a reflection of you and you it. When you create art as a mother you are taking yourself on a journey of self-discovery. This journey will help you eliminate emotional barriers, while learning how to communicate with yourself and others. The journey will leave you feeling grounded and validated in your experiences.Expressive Art is playful
I really want to drive home the fact that you don’t have to be “talented” in the world of creativity in order experience expressive art. You are human and as a human you are innately creative. The art is simple, humans make it complicated. All you need in order to feel the deep and long lasting effects of creative expression is to be honest with yourself and your emotions. AND to just start, start with the blank page, start with the crayola crayon, JUST start. Once you tap into your trust and ability to express, you will quickly wake up. You will come alive again. Life will have meaning. Mothering will have meaning. You as a human will create that meaning in your life.
Plus, you don’t necessarily need to see a therapist to get the therapeutic benefit of creative expression. There are many things you can do right from the comfort of your home. You can try your hand at journaling (art or written), collaging, listening to music, dancing (for the sake of moving your body, not looking polished), sculpting with clay/playdoh, etc. The media you use doesn’t much matter - if you set your intention to be creative and release some stress - you will feel the benefits.
Having said that, I will also say that working with a trained expressive art therapist has it’s own unique advantages; a professional will customize the expressive art therapy activities to your unique life experience, stressors and your therapeutic goals. Working with an expressive art therapist creates connection which is very helpful for managing maternal mental health, mama-burn out, expectations, boundary setting and more.
Keep calm and be creative. Want to know more? Connect with me on how expressive arts can change your life so that you can feel worthy, validated and heard.
Until next time,
