27. Intrusive Thoughts, Mom Math and Postpartum Mental Health with Olivia Scobie author of Impossible Parenting (2 of 3)
Are you a mother struggling with pesky intrusive thoughts, making your fears and doubts even louder?
As a parent, you may face the rarely talked-about issue of intrusive thoughts. These sudden and frightening thoughts often come out of nowhere and can trigger fears and doubts. When parents adjust to caring for a baby during the perinatal period, these thoughts can become particularly prevalent (your inner risk assessor is on HIGH alert).
Our guest, Olivia, the author of Impossible Parenting, delves into this complex issue, sharing valuable insights on how to handle these sneaky mental health struggles.
We discuss our own experiences and the fear and shame that these thoughts can bring. We explore the importance of challenging these thoughts and even considering therapy, offering a thoughtful perspective on managing mental health as a parent.
Tips for Managing Postpartum Mental Health
Understand intrusive thoughts and develop a positive parenting identity
Recognize intrusive thoughts as separate from your identity as a parent or from your desires and actions
Detach these thoughts from reality and address them using therapeutic techniques
Be aware of the impact of postpartum on your mental health, as it brings significant physical and emotional changes
Develop a positive parenting identity to manage postpartum mental health
Maintaining a positive sense of self as a parent is crucial in reducing the impact of intrusive thoughts and postpartum mental health challenges. You can achieve this by feeling secure in your role as a parent, accepting that perfection is unattainable, and being open and curious about your own growth and learning. However, we acknowledge that societal expectations of being a "good parent" can make this difficult, often emphasizing self-sacrifice and constant vigilance. It doesn't have to be this way. Listen to this week's episode!
Ah Ha! moments from this episode:
Shedding light on the challenges of becoming a mom
The numerous risk factors for pregnant people developing perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (PMADs)
How PMADs affect thoughts and emotions
Creating a positive parenting identity
Reflecting on how societal messages impact our perception of being a "good parent"
Our conversation with Olivia emphasizes the crucial role of managing one's mental health as a parent. To tackle the challenges of parenting, it is essential to confront intrusive thoughts, develop a positive parenting identity, and maintain emotional stability. Remember that prioritizing your mental health is not optional, but a necessity. Seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. You deserve to be the best parent you can be, and that starts with taking care of yourself.
So come along with us on this enlightening journey as we try to keep our cool and take care of our mental health while navigating the ups and downs of parenting.
And just when you think you've heard it all, we've got a little preview for you of an upcoming episode about yelling at kids. It's a topic that's actually pretty common, even though not many people like to talk about it. We'll be diving into the guilt that comes with losing your temper and how having unrealistic expectations can make that guilt feel even worse.
Mentionable's
If you're looking to explore further, Olivia's book, "Impossible Parenting: Creating a New Culture of Mental Health for Parents," offers valuable insights and can be found here.
Additionally, you can find more resources and information on perinatal mental health on the Canadian Perinatal Mental Health Trainings website, as well as on their Instagram page (@perinatalmentalhealthtrainings) and Facebook page (Canadian Perinatal Mental Health Training).
Olivia (MSW, RSW, MA) is an Ontario-based queer social work counselor specializing in perinatal mood, reproductive trauma, parental mental health, and provider burnout. With a commitment to continuous learning, she is currently pursuing a PhD in Health Policy and Equity, focusing on the reproductive trauma experiences of LGBT+ birthers. Olivia is the co-founder of Canadian Perinatal Mental Health Trainings and the founder of Postpartum Support Toronto (now Perinatal Wellbeing Ontario). Her belief in eating dessert every day, telling your story, and barrier-free access to healing services shapes her approach to supporting parents.
